The only times we go outside during the week is in the early morning or the early evening. During the day it’s just so freaking hot. So it’s a good thing that my favourite time of day is early morning, closely followed by early evening. I didn’t realise that both these times are known as ‘twilight’.
From Wikipedia: Twilight is the time between dawn and sunrise or between sunset and dusk, during which sunlight scattering in the upper atmosphere illuminates the lower atmosphere, and the surface of the earth is neither completely lit nor completely dark.
Woop, so I love it when the earth is neither completely lit nor completely dark. Cool cool cool.
I recently discovered this band from New Zealand and instantly fell in love. It doesn’t happen very often, but I love finding new music that just feels right. Listening to this song was one of those moments. Enjoy!
So Mika’s birthday is in 4 days. What? Yeah. 4 days. And I’ve been feeling all strange about throwing her a big party and having nightmares where I’m stuck on a Pinterest board and there’s all these mason jars and coloured straws and cupcakes laughing at me and I’ve decided to just chill out about it. Decorations are a waste of environment, presents will weigh us down and we’re still not keen to feed Mika refined sugar. Woah, party nazis much? Yeah.
So instead, on Friday we’ll be making these pancakes into a cake like this, we’ll be drizzling it with this icing and Mika will be able to swim in her paddling pool and climb the stairs as many times as her little heart desires. I’ve begged Ivan to go in search of some pretty flowers for the house and on the weekend, depending on where we’re living (yeah, that’s undecided at the moment!), we’ll hopefully gather with a few family and friends for some lunch and handcrafted yummy treats.
I don’t want anyone to miss out. There is a very good reason to celebrate this week and so here is your party invitation. Make sure you dress the part!
The other day my friend and I were chatting about life. She has just recovered from a nasty illness (totally more nasty than you are even imagining) and I had just returned from a funeral.
She was elated, joyful and high on life. She wanted to high-five the clouds and kiss the ground and dance with everyone in the street. She wanted to take deep breathes and savour the feeling of being alive. She wanted to thank her arms and her legs and her eyes and her lungs and her amazing body for doing what it does.
And there I was. Having returned from a funeral I too probably should have been high on life, but I wasn’t. I was petrified. At the funeral I saw what losing a loved one looks like. I saw painfully real emotions and sadness that I just don’t feel ready for. Every second that passes, my heart feels a little more love for Mika. I have no idea how this is possible, but it’s true. So what does that look like when Mika is 5? Or 10? Or 20? That is a lot of love.
I honestly never quite understood the saying about how when you have a kid your heart lives outside of you (or something like that). But now I totally get it. My heart is hanging out in the form of a little baby girl right now. And at the moment I’m with her most moments of every day, I can see my heart and it’s safe and happy. But I won’t be able to keep watch over it forever, and that scares me. No, wait, it terrifies me.
I feel like I’ve pushed this massive stone (a metaphor for giving birth perhaps?) and now it’s slowly gathering speed and it’s unstoppable. So naturally, my strongest desire is to stop time. Let’s put everyone in a big plastic bubble and freeze time.
Gah, I’m not stupid, I know that’s ridiculous. And I know that it should be even more motivation to seize life and enjoy each moment, like really really enjoy each moment. And to cherish relationships. And make those phone calls and write those letters. And to get excited because we are ALIVE and we are AMAZING and we are YOUNG and we are BEAUTIFUL!
Go tell someone how amazing they are to you. You never know when they might not be around. Thank your body for being so good to you – you never know when things might not be so easy.
(I hate it when people over use ‘just sayin”. Just thought I’d let you know that.)
A mere 19% of you enjoy laundry over any other chore. You’d rather vacuum?.
So yeah, I love doing the laundry. I love everything about it. I love throwing everything into a big laundry basket and balancing it on my hip as I strut around the house scouring for every last dirty item (Ivan’s boxers behind the bathroom door, I’m coming for you!). I love sorting into piles, I love turning the dial on the washing machine, I love how we’re in Mexico and our washing machine is outdoors. I love hanging each item on the line and cooing over how cute Mika’s socks STILL look even after I’ve been exposed to tiny socks for the last 10 months. No-one is immune to the cuteness of baby socks.
I love how quickly clothes dry here in this heat. I love folding the clothes and placing them back into our clothes shelves and hanging them up in our closets.
What is it about doing the laundry that makes me so giddy with happiness?
I have no idea. Sorry, were you expecting some profound analogy? You’re on the wrong blog.
But even though we have a cleaner who comes on Saturdays (what?! a cleaner?! that’s awesome!), I don’t let her touch the laundry. It’s like my therapy or something.
Dear Pamela (January 2013),
You have an awesome life, I hope you haven’t forgotten that. Wherever you are now (hopefully in America or Canada or some exotic location), let’s have a vague look at what you were thinking at the beginning of 2012 in Obregon, Mexico:
Try to get more sleep. I know it’s tough with an ‘alarm clock’ that is permanently set to 2am and 6am, but seriously you don’t need to stay awake til midnight every night. You will look so much better with a little more sleep. Keep active. Your body isn’t getting any younger – run another half marathon and stay proud of what you’ve got. Look at yourself naked in the mirror every day and be thankful. Take care of your teeth. Gosh woman, floss them already would you?! Learn to stop eating before you get to the remorse stage. Learn more songs on the ukulele – you’re not very good, but it’s nice for Mika. Read more books – turn off the computer and read. Keep in touch with your brother. And your grandmas. Kiss Ivan and Mika every single day. Seize opportunities, but never get too busy to play with Mika when she needs you.
And most importantly: Stop procrastinating. Just do it already.
The universe is unfolding as it should. Go boldly.
Love, your biggest fan,
Pamela (January 2012)
(Doesn’t everyone write letters to their future selves? Try it, coupled with a few fun goals for the year – I think I’m set.)